「嫁不好不如不嫁」廖玉蕙寫媽媽經 – 中時電子報
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「嫁不好不如不嫁」廖玉蕙寫媽媽經
2015年06月20日 04:10
中國時報 郭佳容/專訪
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作家廖玉蕙(圖,陳信翰攝)。
現代女性晚婚,一般家庭多的是30多歲還待字閨中的女兒。作家廖玉蕙(在新作《教授別急!》中道盡現代母親對女兒「找不到尪」、既操煩又不敢過問的矛盾心情,她也直言:「婚姻幸福的比例太低了!女性若是嫁不好,不如不要嫁!」廖玉蕙寫作經常取材生活,描繪各式各樣的小人物,不管是家庭理髮師強迫推銷的生意經,或市場裡邊揮刀邊譏誚顧客的鵝肉販,在她筆下栩栩如生、活靈活現,但廖玉蕙最常書寫的題材還是家庭。
「嫁不好不如不嫁」廖玉蕙寫媽媽經 - 中時電子報
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「嫁不好不如不嫁」廖玉蕙寫媽媽經
2015年06月20日 04:10
中國時報 郭佳容/專訪
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作家廖玉蕙(圖,陳信翰攝)。
現代女性晚婚,一般家庭多的是30多歲還待字閨中的女兒。作家廖玉蕙(在新作《教授別急!》中道盡現代母親對女兒「找不到尪」、既操煩又不敢過問的矛盾心情,她也直言:「婚姻幸福的比例太低了!女性若是嫁不好,不如不要嫁!」廖玉蕙寫作經常取材生活,描繪各式各樣的小人物,不管是家庭理髮師強迫推銷的生意經,或市場裡邊揮刀邊譏誚顧客的鵝肉販,在她筆下栩栩如生、活靈活現,但廖玉蕙最常書寫的題材還是家庭。
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「寫作對我來說,是對過往的反省,也是人生歷練的累積。」廖玉蕙與工程背景的先生因相親結識,婚後育有一子一女,3年前兒子結婚生下孫女,她也升格當阿嬤。回首過往,她坦言,「年輕時,由母親安排我去相親,結婚就像一場豪賭,現在婚姻美滿,其實很幸運。」廖玉蕙說,「在我媽那個年代,媽媽會積極介入,現在我們想要關心又不敢明說,怕女兒覺得煩。」在〈瞎操心〉一文中,廖玉蕙對照兩代母親面對兒女婚姻時的不同心態和處境,她提及,女兒一次意外車禍,確認女兒沒事後,她竟關心起肇事的先生:「結婚了沒?年齡多大?在哪工作?」她坦言,「這件事流露出,我還是掛心,不放過任何替女兒牽線的機會。」不過,廖玉蕙也說,她聽過太多婚姻不幸的例子,她還是經常耳提面命,要女兒慎選對象,不要為了湊合而結婚,她說,「與其嫁不好,不如不要嫁,萬一嫁了個難搞的對象,才是大麻煩。」談到經營了近40年的婚姻,廖玉蕙自有一套哲學,她說,「我一向奉行自私自利的原則。」她舉例,因為婆婆住不慣台北,一直由南部的小叔小嬸照顧,感激之餘,她也不吝在人前稱讚小嬸,「照顧是不容易的,除了真心的感激,我也樂意多說肯定的話。」提到選擇對象,廖玉蕙則說,「一開始要做出對的選擇,之後則要把已選擇的做對。」雖然,她曾在文中抱怨先生個性務實,偶爾不解風情,但提及另一半,她還是滿臉笑意說,「相處久了就知道個性,他現在進步很多了啦!」(中國時報),